To many these days, Advent is less a preparation for the celebration of the birth of Christ than a bit of daily fun – increasingly for adults – and an opportunity to enjoy a morsel of chocolate, cheese, fancy jam, gin, craft beer or other delight via an Advent calendar.

I am borrowing this modern, secular interpretation for a spell, though given that capitalism has been up to many coal-in-the-stocking-worthy activities in the past year, you will not have to buy anything to enjoy these morsels. You don’t even have to exercise restraint and dole them out to yourself one per day.

So without further ado, even though we’re past Dec. 1, an Advent list of work-related things I wish for you for the remainder of 2022 and for 2023.

  1. I hope those affected by layoffs find rewarding new roles that meet every need and want that your last job didn’t.

  2. I hope that meeting gets cancelled and is instead an email. Or even better, like two Slack messages. Or even better, on hold until January.

  3. I hope no one makes the office Secret Santa or holiday party awkward or weird. (Drink responsibly, do not desecrate the photocopier, and no one wants anatomically-shaped novelty items.)

  4. I hope you get enough time to relax and unwind over the holidays. Unless you prefer working then because it’s quieter and taking your time off at some other point in the year.

  5. I hope you relax and unwind so much over the holidays that you forget your work account logins in January. (And that the password reset process isn’t excessively ridiculous.)

  6. I hope your work nemesis quits and is replaced by someone fabulous. Or, if said nemesis is toxic and management and HR haven’t been doing enough about it, that they’re all sent to the curb like a Christmas tree in January. (Don’t send your tree to the landfill. They can be composted or fed to goats or other more environmentally friendly uses. Just google it.)

  7. I hope you never, ever cry in the washroom, stairwell, walk-in fridge, in your car in the parking lot, with video off and sound muted on Zoom, or anywhere else work-related and for work reasons.

  8. I hope your company takes DEI initiatives seriously and your workplace becomes more welcoming, supportive and committed to growth, even when it’s uncomfortable for some. (Especially if it’s uncomfortable for some.)

  9. I hope that you can work from home forever, if that is the best workplace for you.

  10. I hope that if you work somewhere other than home, that management and all your co-workers are smart, dedicated to taking care of each other, and work together to make it as safe as possible via all means necessary (HVAC, masking, customer policies, etc.)

  11. I hope you take that leap to do what you really want to do, whether it’s getting a promotion, changing careers, retiring, or dialing back to centre family or other interests.

  12. I hope no one at your workplace ever talks about crypto.

  13. I hope that your work potlucks are delicious, varied, free of allergens, culturally rich, and no one just brings Timbits. (You know who I mean.)

  14. I hope you learn some incredibly cool things, whether they’re related to your job or company or industry or not.

  15. I hope, if you’re unionized, that the union puts your best interests first and works hard for you (and everyone else, no matter how high or low on the ladder), and that you’re not forced to commit to the upheavals of a labour action.

  16. I hope, if you’re not unionized, that your workplace and employment aren’t antagonistic and you don’t need to pursue labour organization.

  17. I hope you are appreciated and that it is expressed publicly on a regular basis and reflected in your remuneration.

  18. I hope you love your work, but understand that no company or organization will ever truly take care of you, so you have smart plans in place to ensure your financial and career wellbeing, as well as a great network.

  19. I hope you’re not allergic to office dogs.

  20. I hope you have at least one excellent work spouse (and the relationship with them is of no concern to any outside-of-work partner). Or, even better, a work family that makes work days great.

  21. I hope, if it’s what you’re looking for, that you go back to your small town for the holidays and find love with the sexy local mayor/baker/Christmas tree farm owner, throw off the shackles of the corporate grind, and learn the true meaning of Christmas.

  22. I hope, if it’s what you’re looking for, that you live in quiet solitude and work from your home cave with your dog far away from Whoville, and aren’t forced to experience the holidays any more than you want to. (If your heart grows three sizes, please see your doctor immediately.)

  23. I hope, if you fly to the west coast to see your estranged spouse for Christmas, that German terrorists don’t disrupt the office party and take over the building, and that you’re not forced to battle them to the death with automatic weapons and a pithy catchphrase, much of the time while not wearing shoes.

  24. I hope that your company does not cancel its Christmas bonus without warning, that you’re never enrolled in a Jelly of the Month Club, that your relatives don’t invade your house uninvited, and that your cousin doesn’t empty his RV’s chemical toilet into your storm sewer.

May your days be merry and bright, may your grandmas never get run over by reindeer, and may you and yours be safe and sane this season, whether you celebrate or not.

M-Theory is an opinion column by Melanie Baker. Opinions expressed are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Communitech. Melle can be reached on Twitter at @melle or by email at